DOn’t MAke me Lecture

The honorable Lance Bass of NSYNC fame is gay.  Yes, it’s true.  He’s out of the closet and dating that hot Reichen dude from The Amazing Race

Why the hell is this a big deal though?  I guess it’s good he’s out of the closet since it may encourage those still "closeted" to come out.  Being a closeted homosexual can’t be easy.  Living a lie of that magnitude to yourself, your family, and your friends would be very tough.   It’s not a position I would ever want to put myself in.  I say this because I have three siblings that are gay.  All of them chose different times to come out, a deeply personal choice of theirs.  Maybe the timing of their "outing" was in fact speed up by a celebrity’s decree.  The upside of Lance’s announcement will hopefully encourage folks to come out of closet.  One can only hope.  Be proud, be gay… I say.

The flipside of this Lance Bass news is "who cares?".  This really shouldn’t be news because being gay isn’t a big deal.  It’s estimated that at least 10% of the population is gay.  I suspect the actual percentage is higher.  Should every celebrity call a news conference when they decide to come out?  Or, in the case of Oprah, make a stupid press release to announce you aren’t gay.  Come on.   Who gives a shit?  I know I sure don’t.  However I’m probably not Average Joe based on where I live and my siblings situations.   

I can only hope five years from now we’re no longer debating the gay marriage issue.  It’s ridiculous how this sort of thing bothers people.  If someone is gay, they’ve likely been gay for a some time people!  Get used to it.  No amount of praying, money, operations, etc. is going to change that.  Don’t we have more important shit to worry about?  Argh.  Okay, I got that off my chest and I feel much better. 

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About lessinges

Seattle native, discovering life! I like ice cream, cold cereal, and The Amazing Race.
This entry was posted in Flirting with Homosexuality, Opinionated. Bookmark the permalink.

63 Responses to DOn’t MAke me Lecture

  1. peek317537 says:

    I’m first. Whoo. My feelings are that people are either born gay or straight. It’s not a choice. Everyone needs to get over it. Enough said!

  2. egan says:

    Peek – thanks for sharing your opinion. I pretty much believe the same thing. It will take some time, but things will hopefully get better. I guess the tough thing is most parents assume their kids are straight and this makes coming out of the closet a very tough process. Ah, you can see this is a hot button issue with me.

  3. Resistance is the first sign of change. I know it’s annoying that people don’t want gay marriage or that people make a big deal about it, but I think it’s just a step toward change. Change of any kind regardless of what you’re talking about is scary to some people. (I learned that in business school, it’s the dissatisfaction stage.)
    Think about when you are sitting in a business meeting and your boss wants to institute something new. Nobody likes it at first. Everybody whines about it and eventually everybody gets over it, because they know it’s not going to go away.
    You can’t expect people to change over night. It doesn’t happen and it will never happen. Eventually, people will learn to live with it and get over themselves.
    I look at marriage kind of like a contract. It’s a business agreement and a protection of sorts. Why should it matter if the people are the same sex or not? I don’t think it should.
    Some of my best friends are gay. If they wanted to get married I would so be there drinking the free beer…that’s what life is all about. It’s a celebration of our differences. Sometimes it just takes a little bit of time to cut through all the crap to get to the celebration.

  4. egan says:

    Blonde Vigilante – great points you make here. I’m not sure you can equate changes at the office to a gay lifestyle, but I see where you’re going with your point. You can control stuff in your office to some extent or just leave the company. There’s no turning your back on being gay. Thanks for your input.

  5. anita says:

    Hey egan did you hear that Lance Bass is gay? I heard they caught him in a pair of white capri pants.
    What? War? Oh don’t talk about that – it’s depressing. So has anyone seen TomKat’s baby yet? I bet you $5 they don’t get married.

  6. egan says:

    Anita – yep, you’d have to be some retard OJ juror not to hear about Lance’s outing. I love capri pants.
    You mean TomKat isn’t married? I heard there’s now a wax baby of Brangelina’s little girl. That’s so freaking cute*.
    *cute = meaning sick in the head

  7. Burr-ee-toe says:

    I agree completely. My best friend and I really want to be able to marry each other if we don’t end up getting married to men. I think it would be fun because we already really like hanging out. I would make dinner and clean the house and she’ll be a doctor supporting me. Good deal, right??

  8. egan says:

    Burr-ee-toe – I have about three quick witted responses in my head, but they will remain there. Umm, yes… this is pretty foolish if you ask me. Being gay is not a sin.

  9. Candace says:

    I’m in the “who cares?” camp. Though it is fun to watch straight guys squirm about it when teased. Do gay guys squirm about being teased that they’re straight?
    I just read that there’s a correlation between how many sons a woman has and whether they are gay or straight. Gay guys are more likely to have a large # of older brothers from the same mother. Probably mom’s uterus goes “enough boys already! I want a girl!”

  10. I know it’s not the same, but I was trying to rationalize peoples silliness. They’ll all die off eventually.
    A friend and I were talking the other day about getting married if she and I got to an age where we wanted to settle down, but couldn’t find someone to do it with. Good damn tax breaks. That is for sure. I get taxed to freaking death. I’m a bad person b/c I’m not married and I don’t have any kids.

  11. Brooke says:

    I just ate most of a bag of Cape Cod Potato Chips. Could you alert the media for me?

  12. anita says:

    BV I’m a bad person too! I’m a bad person because I’m living in sin with my boyfriend. We fornicate.

  13. Burr-ee-toe says:

    Wow, three quick witted responses? You have to at least let me hear one of them.

  14. RoxiMoon says:

    I dont think its anyones business and he shouldnt have felt so hounded that he had to publicly announce that he was gay..
    people should grow up.. shit happens.. as long as he is happy..
    on to lighter subjects..
    hows the weather?

  15. egan says:

    Candace – I don’t know if gay boys squirm when being teased about being straight. I’m going to guess it doesn’t happen all that often. Who would do the harassing? Yes, I’ve heard that same study and I’m a little skeptical about that one.
    Blonde Vigilante – you rationalizing someone’s narrow-minded thought process is what makes you cool. I mean that in all sincerity. I totally get where you were going with your statement. I do. However you don’t have to defend them. Would you defend a member of the clan? Taxes are good.
    Brooke – do you have your own magazine where you can publish an entire story about how you aren’t addicted to those potato chips?
    Anita – get this, my wife and I lived in sin before we got married. I’m waiting for God to strike me down.
    Burr-ee-toe – they were all kind of lewd so I will hold off. That’s more Candace’s domain than mine.
    RoxiMoon – that’s exactly how I feel. It sucks that one is forced to make a public statement about their lifestyle. Man I hate the expression “gay lifestyle”. The weather is about 77 degrees and sunny. Just the way I like it.

  16. L says:

    The timing of his announcement is interesting, don’t you think? Good for him for announcing it. Even though gay folk are all over his industry, to be the person in the spotlight and admit it is still so taboo. He took a big risk doing that, even if NSYNC is kaput.
    I think that by encouraging others to come out of the closet, we’re working toward your second scenario where eventually such an announcement would elicit “who cares?” responses.
    You have 3 siblings who are gay? That can’t be coincedence. Have they signed up to participate in any studies investigating the science of sexual preference?
    Did you see in the news yesterday that the WA Supreme Court upheld the ban on same-sex marriage?

  17. Melissa says:

    I’m very much of the ‘live and let live’ category. Gay marriage was introduced here a few months ago, and i know alot of people who’ve got married since and it has just made them happier. If it makes you happy, I’m all for it! I do think it must be hard oor people to come out of the closet though as there is such an assumption and prejudices against homosexuality.

  18. Burr-ee-toe says:

    Okay, well if Candace has any lewd thoughts for me, I’m all ears! 🙂

  19. egan says:

    L – the ban on the gay marriage in this state is what got me all fired up. It’s ridiculous that five adults consider gay couples to be unfit to create a “stable” environment. That shit really pisses me off. We haven’t participated in any study that I know of. Hey, please tell me you didn’t just say “sexual preference”?
    Melissa – yes, very true. I think there are many straight people that get married that aren’t happy. There’s a reason the divorce rate in this country hovers around 50%. Thanks for your feedback.

  20. egan says:

    Burr-ee-toe – Candace is currently busy cropping shit, online silly. Don’t go there in your head. Once she gets back I’m sure she won’t mind giving you some raunchy witty remarks for that comment of yours. I will leave it alone.

  21. kim says:

    Im jealous of your weather and your calves and your capri pants
    and
    Hug your brothers for me

  22. egan says:

    Kim – really? That’s a lot of things to be jealous about. I would have to have really long arms to hug all my brothers (five of them), but I will do my best. Capri pants rule!

  23. Candace says:

    Egan stop being such a pansy.
    Here’s what was going through Egan’s head(s)
    1) “Hanging out! Hahahaha!” (he’s thinking about boobies here)
    2) Doctor – oooh. Is she an Ob/Gyn? She can practice on you at home? Does she bring home her tools of the trade? (and other things he thought were all witty, but really weren’t)
    3) He should have gone for the “supporting” thing, but he couldn’t get his sick little mind past the image of you cleaning the house in a French maid costume.
    Am I right or am I right? Vote here. Egan’s vote only counts half.
    Egan, is it brothers, sisters or both? I’m not sure that the word “gay” is exclusively the realm of men anymore.

  24. egan says:

    Candace – two brothers and one sister. I don’t think “gay” is gender specific. Huh, these are three very good scenarios. I hesitate to hint where my mind was going or to even type this sentence. Well, the sentence stays.

  25. Burr-ee-toe says:

    hahaha… I love Candace! Any chance she’ll marry me??

  26. egan says:

    Burr-ee-toe – oh, you’re just going to cheapen the sanctity that is marriage. Oh wait, Britney already did that. Oops, she did it again.

  27. Burr-ee-toe says:

    Exactly! There’s nothing that I could do that would ever be worse the the example that Mr. and Mrs. Britney Spears have set for us.

  28. Burr-ee-toe says:

    I just put the twice instead of “than the”. I’m retarded.

  29. egan says:

    Burr-ee-toe – the whole agrument of “marriage as an institution” was thrown out a long time ago. Fuck that noise. How many times has Pamela Anderson been married? I rest my case.

  30. egan says:

    Burr-ee-toe – you’re not retarded unless you decide to favor Candace over me. Make sure you note this in your journal.

  31. egan says:

    Sprizee – very good question. I have a reason for everything, sort of like Jesus.
    DOMA – Defense Of Marriage Act. I will let the folks at Wikipedia explain it.

  32. sprizee says:

    Why’d you have to bring up the bible? I was thinking this site is more like Lost! I heard if look at the monkey graphic upside down you see a secret message.

  33. egan says:

    Sprizee – the creator of the monkey on my blog is playing mind tricks on us.

  34. Melissa says:

    Haha, these comments started rather serious and, well now, not so much.
    I’m agreeing with Candace up there.

  35. egan says:

    Melissa – it’s still a serious topic. I don’t want to take away from that. However, it’s refreshing to see there’s some humor mixed in. Candace thinks she’s the shit. Please don’t boost her ego.

  36. Jennifer says:

    I think what annoyed me most about this “news” was seeing it featured in a prominent headline position on CNN.com, right beside the “developing story” about the Middle East situation.
    I mean, how in God’s name have we not moved past the novelty scintillation aspect and on to the ‘live, let live, move on’ bit yet?
    Sexual preference and all attendant issues have become very tired distractions – for far too long a time – given the things we could be concerning ourselves with in the world today.

  37. Burr-ee-toe says:

    Well said Jennifer!

  38. egan says:

    Jennifer – exactly, how is it more important that Mr. Bass is gay than whether or not Condi brokered a cease fire? Crazy fucking world we live in.
    Burr-ee-toe – yes, this Jennifer person is a sharp cookie with a pimped out blog.

  39. sandra says:

    He waved “bye bye bye” to his in-the-closetness, and I’m happy for him — but you’re right, it shouldn’t be a big deal. At least it sounds like his friends & family are supportive!

  40. egan says:

    Sandra – nice lyrical work there. Yes, it’s good to know he’s got support behind him. This isn’t always the case and much tougher for lower profile people, i.e. Joe Blow citizen. Who cares? Thanks for your thoughts.

  41. ChickyBabe says:

    My sentiments exactly! My first reacion is ‘what’s the big deal?” but it is for some people since many bloggers are raining the issue.
    I should hope that people can celebrate who they are and live the lives they wish for themselves. Everybody deserves that.

  42. I would definitely marry you, Burr-ee-toe if I wasn’t already married. Oh and if I couldn’t break Dobie up from his girlfriend. I hear he’s really tall.
    Egan you were right except that you should have said “Candace knows she’s the shit. Please don’t boost her ego.”
    So you still hesitate? Cuz yours were lamer? Or cuz you’re still a pansy? And I don’t mean pansy like gay, I mean like wuss. }:->
    Why am I feeling so sassy today? All this talk of height must have gone to my head.

  43. Loudlush says:

    I was waaay more interested in Lance training for space travel than this latest revelation. He likes boys? Great, so do I.

  44. Candace says:

    He was gonna be an astronaut, and now he’s a spelunker.

  45. msmachine says:

    I will be very happy when a person’s choice of a partner is not news worthy simply because of the persons gender. It will no longer be news worthy once being gay is “acceptable”. The fact that it is still “news” indicates that we have more work to do as a culture or nation to value all of our people. So, I guess what this means is if you are not gay you should just get over it. Love is love. If you are gay I hope you live in an environment that is accepting and you are able to be yourself. There is way too much to say about this for a comment sized space… but thanks for the post Egan. Got me going on something that is important to me.

  46. Eunice says:

    Funny, my reaction to the news was the same…”big flippin’ deal.” Not because the dude is gay but because N’sync is so 1999.

  47. Dobermann says:

    Who cares about those? I mean, it’s just as big deal as any other people dating.
    Egan, is this your tattoo?

  48. egan says:

    ChickyBabe – yes, let people live their own lives. This is such an important issue to me.
    Candace – your sassy all the time. You’re married? Gutter Munkkeeyy doesn’t count. I’m not a pansy, but call me one if you must.
    Loudlush – well stated. Who gives a rats ass about this development? I don’t blame him at all, it’s just sad it’s all over the entertainment channels and magazines.
    Candace – very tacky.
    MsMachine – this is obviously a very personal story for me. I’ve opened a few people’s minds about this very issue. It hasn’t been easy, but every little step helps. Gay people are people just like anyone else. It’s quite sad that I even have to blog about this topic in 2006.
    Eunice – good for you. I must add it wouldn’t make any difference was still popular or if The Edge from U2 came out. It should matter at all. No brainer, let’s move to why the fuck we are still bombing the shit out of Iraq. Much more important.
    Dobermann – yep, that’s so true. No different than anyone else. We’ll have to revisit the issue five years from now. Only one state of fifty in our great land sanctions gay marriages. Just wonderful. (that’s not my tattoo, but if I were to get one… I might have to do that. Thanks)

  49. Dobermann says:

    Ok, I just thought since it had that pinkish/purple unicorn..
    People understand better the fact that someone jumps out of closet than what’s going on in some far-away country.. I mean, these kind of news are just what the powers-that-be want to take all the attention. I mean, even if the stuff about war is in news, those news will be oveerthrown by news about Paris Hilton, someone coming out of closet and all the other “important” things.

  50. Fitena says:

    You’re right! Who cares!
    You’re right about it being tough to live with a lie. No matter what the issue is. sexual orientation or anything else.
    Fitèna

  51. trisha says:

    Wow. You are realllly pretty.

  52. Party Girl says:

    I am jumping up and down and clapping widley in praise of this post.
    Who-the-hell-cares-!
    I don’t understand why so many people do.
    I don’t understand why it’s such a big deal.
    I don’t understand how people can say the Bible backs up the claims that it is wrong.
    I simply don’t get it.
    On the flip side: 3 siblings who are gay. Wow, how many siblings are there altogether?
    Simply curious.

  53. Sassy says:

    Sometimes I’m sassier than others. I like flowers; pansies aren’t necessarily a bad thing. Especially if they’re over 6′.
    Yes, it was extrememly tacky, wasn’t it? So tacky I’m stuck to my chair. Run with it! You know you want to.)
    Munki can count to at least 21.

  54. anita says:

    YEE-HAAAA! The South will rise again!
    Your siblings are lucky not to live in the southeast. I live in the most liberal part of the state of Georgia, gay-rights wise. But I grew up with a best friend who got beat up for being gay. Also, we still have segregated proms in some schools. God help you if you’re gay AND a minority in the South. Not like it’s a picnic everywhere else, though.
    Also, as much as I hate to say it, this Lance Bass shit is probably a publicity stunt. The homosexual-geared music market is relatively untapped and there will be a backlash of support from the gay community for Lance in the face of all the anti-gay laws – likely selling tons of records if he decides to pursue a solo career (which he claims to have no interest in, but who knows).

  55. egan says:

    Dobermann – you’re too wise. What are they feeding you over there?
    Fitèna – thanks, it’s such a dumb issue. Not newsworthy if you ask me. Someday someday.
    Trisha – I’m really pretty? Huh? Oh, you’re a new reader. Welcome to my blog. I thought you were someone else. Good think I clicked on your link. Thanks for the kind words and enjoy your Friday.
    Party Girl – thanks for understanding. Our reluctance to accept gays (and others) is annoying. I have six siblings, five brothers and one sister. I’m the second youngest in the family. Yes, the odds of having three gay children have been exceeded.
    Candace – I’m still not touching that comment. The spelunking remark kind of pisses me off. I’m serious about the gay issues and you make some comment that really doesn’t help. Sorry, it just rubbed me the wrong way.
    Anita – one of my brothers that’s gay just happens to live in Atlanta, your hometown. He moved there to get away from a boyfriend in Seattle. I hear from him that Atlanta is fairly tolerant towards the gay population. But I would guess that an hour outside of the city… people are much less tolerant. Sucks that I have to even type that shit. I do know about the segregated proms. Fuck, it’s 2006 and that’s still happening, how sad.
    My other brother lives in southern Georgia so I hear about the racism that still happens there. Fun times. You know what, I don’t give a shit if it’s a publicity stunt or not, let’s just move on. He’s gay, big deal.

  56. Sassy says:

    Sorry Egs. Sometimes (most times) I’m really gauche. That’s why’ll I’ll never be President. I really oughtha stay away from the serious ones.

  57. egan says:

    Candace – it’s all good, trust me. Check your email.

  58. anita says:

    Yeah. It still takes balls to come out. Didn’t mean to depreciate it – I was a bit of a Negative Nancy this morning, looking back at that.

  59. egan says:

    Anita – it’s okay, I know your heart was in the right place.

  60. L says:

    Oh, ouch. See how mired I am in the status quo? I’m becoming one of the complacent…I can feel it; I’ve been too mired in my personal stupid problems. Fuck. I did spend time that I didn’t have to spare at the central library today, getting my (D) on. I’m comin’ home, baby.

  61. Dobermann says:

    I don’t know, must be the beef? Or vegetables? Or GW.B’s stupidity hasn’t depressed me since I’m so far away?

  62. Ynot says:

    Lance Bass is gay? Just googled him. Kinda ugly. Why do only the ugly ones come out? Why can’t a cute guy come out once in a while…? Like Tom Cruise?

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