ADD in Full Effect

Today marks the start of some important house improvement projects.  We hope to get them finished before we get into the warmer summer months and the third trimester.  As I type this post we have two guys at our house replacing our three attic windows. 

Next week our new Asko dishwasher will be installed.  Get this, it’s called a "virgin install" since our home still has the original hymen cabinets intact.  I’m so damn excited about not handwashing every dish, glass, spoon, neck massager, garlic press, etc. as we have for the last two years.  Our previous house had a great Asko dishwasher so we’re sticking with what worked for us.  I don’t like regression… handwashing all the dishes after parties sucked ass.  Honestly though, it wasn’t too bad washing stuff yet I don’t trust myself to get things clean enough when the baby arrives.

And then we have the mack daddy project, our basement bathroom remodel.  We found a guy to do the work for significantly less than our first estimate.  We just have to pick out the tile, sink, shower fixtures and then let him get to town.  Work should start in about 2-4 weeks and last for about 2-3 weeks.


Last night we toured the hospital we plan to use.  It was nice to see the birthing suites and all the other mothers.  Most of the expectant mothers were in the 25-35 weeks pregnant range.  There was this one dude who insisted on tinkering with everything while the guide was giving her verbal presentation.  About 20 minutes after she had politely asked us to turn off our cellphones, he pulls his phone out of his coat and proceeds to call a buddy.  You can hear him saying how boring the tour of the hospital is while the pleasant guide is talking.  Somehow she was able to concentrate more than me.  This moron was bugging the crap out of me turning switches on and off, using the hospital phone to call his friends, raising & lowering the bed, and then the cellphone thing.  Eventually I looked at him and just shook my head, showing my disapproval. 

About 20 people were on this tour.  8-10 of us got in an elevator and went down a floor.  When we got out of the elevator we realized he wasn’t there and started making fun of him.  I mentioned his two phone calls, the button pushing, and another woman jumped in sharing how annoyed she was too.  I looked to my left and saw his wife/girlfriend/friend with benefits hiding in the corner overhearing everything we said.  Ouch!  When he came down on the next elevator she lectured him and they disappeared from the tour.  Good riddance.

There was lots of valuable information for mothers to learn and this guy insisted on upstaging the presentation with his anti-establishment antics.  If I was the guide, I would have insisted he leave the room.  That’s why I’m not a guide though.  ….


…which brings me to this random thought.  There was a point in my life where I really wanted to be a national park ranger.  I wanted to work in the various National Parks.  Then I thought about how lonely it could be and how little they get paid and how few job openings there are a year.  I think I made the right choice, but I still love the outdoors.  Nothing like a trip to Mt. Rainier National Park to ease the mind. 


TODAY’S RULED OUT BABY NAMES: Pat, Shannon, Aaron, America, Yuriy, and Soleil.


P.S. Today is my father-in-law’s 65th birthday.  Happy Birthday G-PO! 


About lessinges

Seattle native, discovering life! I like ice cream, cold cereal, and The Amazing Race.
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44 Responses to ADD in Full Effect

  1. kelwhy says:

    Happy bday G-PO! and many more… sounds like you have tons going on and it’s all good…
    take care!

  2. ms. sizzle says:

    that guy is a total ass and unfortunately, he’s going to be a dad soon. that scares me more! imagine the child’s behavior if that is the dad’s behavior?!
    is not america as a name, what about americus? πŸ˜‰ jk.

  3. Amanda says:

    2 years of handwashing dishes? Damn your wife is a patient woman! And that guy with a cell phone – holy crap! I would have knocked the phone out of his hands after I gave him my death glare.
    Soleil – I automatically think of Punky Brewster. What a great show.

  4. Rachel says:

    Gotta love the assholes who have to be the center of attention at all times. I feel sorry for his wife/girlfriend or whatever she is while she is in labor. He will probably be sitting there telling her to be quiet during her contractions because he can’t hear the commentary during the football/basketball/baseball game.
    Good choice nixing the name Pat. It always makes me thing of “It’s Pat:The Movie.”

  5. furiousball says:

    I have a brother in law that opens and closes the state parks in Albuquerque, NM. He’s a photographer so he takes these amazing sunrise and sunset shots all year long.
    That guy is really sad. He probably drove his grade school teachers insane and if he keeps that up during labor, his baby’s momma is going to kick him out the hospital window.

  6. egan says:

    Kelwhy – tons of stuff. This morning I sat in the MINI staring blankly in space for about two minutes. Then I snapped out of it and realized it was time to work.
    Ms. Sizzle – I thought the exact same thing about Mr. Button Pusher. I gave him the benefit of the doubt the first couple instances and then gave up. What a moron. He had the nerve to kind of mock the guide too as she was talking about maternity ward. Ugh.
    Americus or Amerigo?
    Amanda – I did about 80% of the dishwashing during that time, but my wife did about 90% of the cooking. I won’t take the dishwasher for granted once it’s plugged in and ready to go. It was tempting not to knee the guy in the nuts. I think he thought he was Bender from The Breakfast Club. I had a huge (no pun intended) crush on Punky.

  7. Good for Me says:

    i can’t deal when people don’t have respect. though, i sorta feel bad for his lady friend scraping herself from the elevator innards. oh well. i’m sure she layed into him good.
    yeah, there really is not time for handwashing dishes once the littles ones start coming. congrats…on your virgin installment.

  8. mez says:

    gee, that guy sounds like SUCH a support to his wife/gf who is HAVING HIS BABY!
    re: renovations. Every couple seems to do the reno thing before the baby comes. The difference is that you guys are actually getting stuff done BEFORE the baby comes! πŸ˜€

  9. Amanda says:

    I think everyone had crushes on Punky. Even I had a little girl crush on her back in the day. She ruled!

  10. Buggss says:

    I’m sure that idiot’s better half would have torn strips off him – pregnant woman have been known to unhinge their lower jaw when in a tirade πŸ˜‰
    Ranger jobs seem to be the same all over – low pay,massive work loads,isolation,no respect…and that’s just the office workers!
    After seeing the movie Wrong Turn,I’m happy you’re not a ranger!!!

  11. Amy says:

    Cell phone people drive me CRAZY!
    I worked in a National Park one summer. Banff National Park. It was awesome!

  12. egan says:

    Rachel – this guy is going to be a major pain as a dad. I can see it already. And forget about delivery day. He’ll eat hot dogs with the forceps. You got the Pat thing alright. I couldn’t decide whether to color Pat red or blue.
    Furiousball – he was some strange sideshow act. Really, did he have to call someone while the lady was giving information about the most important day of most people’s lives? Your brother has quite the job. Is he single? I always thought it would be impossible to see someone in that line of work.
    Good for Me – uh huh, no time for that stuff. Pile them in the washer and let a machine handle the caked on white sauce. I wanted to go all Jack Bauer on him, but I restrained myself.
    Mez – that guy definitely wouldn’t buy roses from the Rose Woman. He’d taunt her or something. We’re trying to get as much done as possible. The windows are now in and look awesome. Bring on the dishwasher! Thanks for your support.
    Amanda – she was so adorable and still is pretty damn cute. I love her True Hollywood Story.
    Buggss – so sad isn’t it? I did figure it out though. Most rangers and park employees tend to be older. They do the jobs for semi-retirement. It’s a paycheck and you’re working in the great outdoors. Unfortunately our National Park system is severely underfunded so not many our age can take that job.
    I’m not really sure his girlfriend will give him a good lesson. I joked to her when he picked up the hospital phone, “is he ordering pizza for later tonight?” She hardly even noticed what was going on. I’m glad he was so involved. What I neglected to mention is how he videotaped almost the entire visit on his camera. I should search for the video on YouTube because I’m sure it’s there.

  13. egan says:

    Amy – I know, I know, I know… you hate cell phones. I have to tell you though, with or without the cell phone this guy was a grade A prick. If he didn’t have the phone he would have continued to use the hospital phone or raised and lowered the birthing bed.
    Banff, I need to go there. It’s really not too far from Seattle. Everyone that goes there loves it. I’ve seen amazing shots and so many movies have been filmed there. What did you do there? I almost took a job at Yellowstone making beds at a hotel inside the national park.

  14. Eve says:

    Wait, America was ruled out today? What’s still in the running?

  15. Amy says:

    Karma has a way of biting people in the butt. That guy is probably going to have a hellion for a child.
    What did I do in Banff? I was a campground attendant at Tunnel Mountain Campground, back in 1996. I got to wear one of thoese super-cool and official looking brown uniforms. I also got to drive around in a big old white 1971 truck (recycled from the army). There were two trucks actually. We named them “Huff” and “Puff”, after the noises they made. That’s how we could tell them apart.(You can add those names to your list of eliminated names.) I didn’t really do much, but I loved the people I “worked” with and the pay was awesome.

  16. egan says:

    Eve – yes, America is out of the running. Baby Australia and Swaziland are still in the running though. I’ve always been a little partial to Baby Belize.

  17. Eunice says:

    You haven’t had a dishwasher for two years?!?! Madge, get this man a soak!

  18. celeste says:

    Good call on getting a dishwasher before the baby arrives. You’ll need it!

  19. Leezer says:

    Seriously? I think this guy was on my hospital tour (of Swedish) six years ago! My husband and I were so annoyed at the cell-phone and the interruptions that we wondered how he would ever carve out time for a family. Hopefully, he came around. It’s amazing, isn’t it, how having a baby changes your perspective for the better?
    Happy Birthay to your Dad!!!

  20. Leezer says:

    Oh, Egan, BTW, I vote for “America” as the name. LOVE IT!!!! (I’m all for place-names, my daughter’s name is Georgia in honor of my husband’s Southern roots.)

  21. egan says:

    Amy – that’s the kind of job I would like. I’m sure you got plenty of face time and met tons of new people. I’m shocked the pay was awesome.
    Eunice – I know, I sound a bit high maintenence on this one. Two years isn’t too bad, but I know when a kid comes the dishes will pile up.
    Celeste – that’s my thought too. We could use one now so I’m sure we’ll definitely desire one post-partum.
    Leezer – I wonder how many children this guy has fathered. Let’s hope not too many. The fool will be in for a real wake up call in about two months.
    Leezer – funny you should mention place names. Both my wife and have towns named after us (not really, but you get the picture). My brother’s name is Everett so they kind of run in the family.
    There’s an Egan, Louisiana: Egan, Illinois: Egan, Eagan, Minnesota: and an Egan Range in Nevada.

  22. lord f says:

    have you considered:
    anything ending in “ton”
    lord f

  23. lord f says:

    or you could try my word verification from the last post, “wcbynb”.
    hugs and mittens,
    lord f

  24. churlita says:

    I lived in a State Park for almost a year. I was in the California Conservation Corps. Working on the Salmon Restoration Project. It was the toughest and weirdest job I’ve ever had, but I loved it. I don’t know if I could have done it forever, though.
    Oh, and that ADD guy was hilarious. I don’t know why his BabyMama didn’t get on his case while he was making such an ass of himself and nip it in the bud.

  25. It’s too bad your wife isn’t going to the Scrubs hospital, or the Janitor could’ve drop-kicked asswad out of the third-floor window!

  26. Phats says:

    I can’t believe you did not have a dishwasher! That would be a pain in the ass I would imagine.
    I have done what you did before and I felt like an idiot. talk about someone not realizing their friend or family member are listening d’oh!
    Have a good one

  27. Amber says:

    I just got back from a stint out of town and had to catch up on all my favorite blogs. So here are some random comments about your last few posts i.e. the ones I missed:
    1.) Good Lord, I really hope I’m not one of the bloggers you were talking about in reference to “feeling the animosity” and all of that. *Shudder* It’s amazing how differently (at times) you can see yourself as opposed to what others see. But it’s always interesting to learn.
    2.) Remodeling while living in the house can truly suck. But it sounds like you guys are on the right track with hiring other people to do the big stuff. My dad is one of those “jack of all trades” types and he and my mother are “do it yourself-ers.” Unfortunately, my dad runs a company and works a lot, up until recently my mom was buried in student teaching. Now that she’s done and just waiting for the school year to start when she’ll have a job, the fact that the house is in disarry is really getting to her. They work on it together during the weekends and it’s slowly coming together. But life happens and there’s other things you gotta do on the weekends sometimes, ya know? They stripped the kitchen to the walls, gutted it completely, and re-did EVERYTHING. Now they’re doing the same thing to the living room. I guess I’m just saying that if you’re going to take on major projects, for the love of God, HIRE SOMEONE! If it’s small stuff that isn’t really going to affect your day-to-day life, then by all means… knock yourself out. At least that’s my opinion after watching my parents for the last year and a half :).
    3.) Swimming rocks! You use the most muscles and while you still sweat, it’s washed away before you smell the stink. Exercise without sweating (more or less)?! Perfect! πŸ˜€
    4.) I’m glad you got the insurance stuff worked out!
    5.) Sounds like you are both really on the up and up with the pregnancy and all the details that go into it. I cannot wait to read the announcment of Baby Lessinges arrival and your reaction. I’ll say it again: You guys are going to be great parents!
    Okay, I think that’s it for now, unless I happen to re-read something and realize I forgot a “point” which is highly possible as it’s almost 2am, lol.
    Take care, Egan!

  28. ubermilf says:

    You need that dishwasher! Otherwise you have to boil everything you need to sanitize, and that takes 4-evah.
    Names suggestions: Guinness, Amstel, Harp, Bailey, Bass, Kahlua, Jagermeisster

  29. *pixie* says:

    Sounds like you were more patient than I would have been with that asshat in the hospital. What is wrong with peopleβ€”no common sense, no common courtesy, I say “Be gone with ye!”

  30. I think this is called nesting.
    Maybe the random thought is not so random. Having a baby is so so natural…why wouldn’t you be yearning a bit for the out of doors?
    I see you’ve ruled out Stick as a name. I think you might also want to consider its cousin – Stink.
    Glad to see – as far as I can see – that Pink is not yet ruled out!

  31. CSL says:

    Did you consider writing “I have a big penis” on obnoxious cellphone guy’s car?
    My 13-year-old son recently announced he wants to change his name to Joe Blackheart. He has synesthesia with names and numbers representing themselves as colors, and this would be a red & black name. I told him I might change my last name to blackheart, too and he said, “Oh, no, your name is yellow and white, it wouldn’t match.

  32. Gawpo says:

    I have a virtually unused automatic dishwasher. Living alone, I wash my fork, my spoon, my bowl and my cup by hand. Yep, one hand.

  33. egan says:

    lord f – one of the suggested names is still in the running. Think XTC and you have a winner.
    lord f – that would be a good Eastern European name. I like it very much. Can you sound it out for me?
    Churlita – the guy wasn’t sitting next to his future baby’s mom after she got up to use the bathroom. I know a thing or two about those weird outdoors jobs.
    Malnurtured Snay – yeah, the janitor would have taught him a lesson. I hope J.D. would hate him.
    Phats – I didn’t feel too much like an idiot because I joked with her about him ordering pizza after the first call. Therefore she had to know I was on his side for a bit. Go Colts!
    Amber – wow, you’re very thorough. Swimming does rock and it works heaps of muscles. We think hiring people to do the work is the best solution. Keeps us happy and the work gets done.
    Ubie – that was my thinking. Kids don’t tend to enjoy spoiled milk. I haven’t considered those lovely spirited names of yours. Maybe we can name him Mark and then Maker’s Mark would be appropriate.
    *pixie* – I finally gave up and rolled my eyes and shook my head. Oh yeah, then I talked smack about him when his girlfriend was unknowingly over my shoulder.
    Reverend Sumangali – Pink is still in the running as of now. Nesting is right, I can’t seem to find a thing right with the house currently. It’s a severe case of nesting. Okay, the house isn’t in that bad of shape.
    CSL – that’s a pretty cute story from your son. I like the way he thinks of names as colors. If I was to scribble on this guy’s vehicle, I’d have to stalk him. Not sure my wife would be on board with this activity.
    Gawpo – sounds like you need to host a few more parties to break in the dishwasher.

  34. Mone says:

    I dont like people without manners.

  35. Nessa says:

    You are so damn sweet. I love how excited you are.
    People like that guy make me crazy. They are so selfish and selfcentered. He’s going to be a great (as in not) father.

  36. Burr-ee-toe says:

    Have you ever noticed how it feels like it takes SO much longer to complete a project on the house when you do it yourself. It has taken us like 3 months to finish painting a 700 square foot condo. Why are we so slow??

  37. Ryan says:

    I love picking out bathroom fixtures at Lowe’s. Makes me feel all manly and shit.
    You tour the hospital before the kid falls out? lol. I didn’t know that. πŸ˜€

  38. egan says:

    Mone – true, people without manners is like an ice cream without sugar… why bother.
    Nessa – thank you very much. Yep, this guy is a fool alright.
    Burr-ee-toe – uh huh, totally noticed that. Paying someone to do the work is usually so worth it in my book. I don’t want to live in a half finished house all the time.
    Ryan – do you wear your paint kissed pants? That’s a requirement for home improvement stores. If your jeans are clean, you’re clearly a rookie.

  39. Tall Chick says:

    Dude! You should so see some episodes of Red Green so that you can fully appreciate Ranger Gord! ^_^
    I think you would laugh your ass off. It might be on PBS. It used to be. Or if you get any Canadian stations, it could be on there.
    We’re in the market for a new dishwasher too. GE Profiles are a piece of crap. Consumer Reprts says that there’s a Kenmore that’s a best buy, but their last recc (a fridge) sucks ass, so I’m undecided. Meanwhile, the bubble in the linoleum – er excuse me – vinyl grows larger and every day I pull a new piece of broke, fried seal, or (gasp) O-ring outta the dishwasher. πŸ˜›
    Congrats on your new indentured servant!
    The guy at the tour sounds like such a jerk. He’s gonna be a shit father, how much do you want to bet?
    When Mollusc was born, the nurses asked if they could borrow her for the “big sibling” tour so they could show the kiddies a new baby. It was so cute. We have some great pics. ^_^

  40. Tall Chick says:

    broken, not broke. I naver say broke. That was pure typo. Just so you know.

  41. Tinabellina says:

    Ugh, I hate people like that. My husband says its because I’m a “Rule Follower” (and I am), but I don’t understand how people can think that kind of behavior is acceptable. It’s amazing to me.
    Question — how far along are you guys?

  42. Hannelie says:

    Happy Birthday to FIL (Father in law)
    My MIL turned 81 on the 2nd!

  43. egan says:

    Tall Chick – we’re buying an Asko. Actually we already bought it and it should be installed in about 12 hours. The american brands are a bit too big for our older cabinets.
    Tall Chick – Canadian tv is the best. I love the French Canadian stuff and This Hour has 12 Minutes.
    Tinabellina – I’m a rule abider as well. It just works better that way. Mrs. Lessinges is in her 14th week now. The due date is August 7th.
    Hannelie – wow, that’s getting up there. Is she healthy and all that good stuff?

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