Can You See Me Now?

Mystify Me Week continues here at Les Singes.  (les singes is the plural form of monkey in French in case you don’t speak the language).  The last post I asked about some social behavior.  Now I’d like to learn more about some virtual behaviors which confound me. 

As many of you know, I might read a blog or two during the day.  While reading the blogs I can see certain patterns developing.  Some days everyone rips Tom Cruise a new one, some days you see the same "meme" on eighteen different blogs, and some days you might see dangling genitalia.  Okay so the genitals thing is scarce, but I got your attention.  The other day I ran into three posts chatting about about delurking.

For those of you unfamiliar with delurking, allow me to explain.  Apparently there are people out there who read blogs and don’t comment.  Some bloggers take exception to these so called "lurkers".  Here’s where I’m confused though.  Aren’t blogs public?  Why are these blog authors attempting to lure these "lurkers" to comment on their blog?  Is there something wrong with reading a blog and not leaving a comment? 

I’ve attended many public gatherings, company meetings, etc. where not everyone speaks.  Think about your last town hall meeting, company meeting, or even our elections.  Should everyone in attendance be forced to say something?  I think not.  Are we paranoid somebody is reading our public blog that shouldn’t be? 

I know I’m going to take a lot of heat on this one because many of my beloved readers do this "delurk" thing.  So I’m asking why.  Why does it bother you to have someone read your blog and not leave a comment?  I will admit I don’t comment on many blog posts I read.  Maybe I can’t relate to the topic, maybe I just want to remain anonymous.  Perhaps the lurker doesn’t have a blog and wants to continue to read without being guilted into blogging.  What’s the point of flushing out the "lurkers"?


About lessinges

Seattle native, discovering life! I like ice cream, cold cereal, and The Amazing Race.
This entry was posted in Egan Wants to Know, Opinionated, Science, Web/Tech. Bookmark the permalink.

74 Responses to Can You See Me Now?

  1. BigBro says:

    To me the premise is akin to wondering, “if a blogger blogs, and no one comments, is it read?”
    Comments are a form of affirmations-that when the tree fell in the woods, someone heard it (most likely John Muir or Audubon)! Our own little security blanket that someone knows we blog…

  2. Deutlich says:

    Had the same thoughts that entire week but then submitted because I am WEAK!
    But.. yeah. In all reality? I don’t give two shits if people just “lurk.” I mean, why would I put my shit out there for the world to read and then get all verklempt over lack of commenting?
    Nevermind that this completely contradicts the fact that I participated in delurk week at all.

  3. egan says:

    Big Bro – yeah, that’s a good comparison. I do run into blogs without comments and it does make me wonder if anyone reads it or not. Ha, good thing I got you hooked on blogging.

  4. egan says:

    Deutlich – mad props to you for this confession. You’re definitely one of the bloggers on my mind as I typed this entry. I know exactly why you posted it: Blog365 yo! It’s so great when you speak German.

  5. Chris says:

    I’m one for now, will I be one when I hit the post button?
    I don’t particularly have a problem with lurkers and in fact, I kind of like the idea that someome is peeking in at me on the hush hush.
    there are times however, times when I may be feeling vulnerable or lonely (for lack of a more sophisticated and somewhat more accurate word) – that I really just want to see those comments there so I can have some tangible evidence of a visit. There are also moment where I have to stop and wonder why am I posting if nobody is reading until I remind ymself that I am doing this for me just as much as anybody. Thanks for making me think tough guy.

  6. Chris says:

    Darn phone ringing and everyone commenting ahead of me.

  7. Think Jacob says:

    I’m not commenting today. I’m lurking. Good luck “delurking” me.

  8. egan says:

    Chris – great insight here. I do think the crux of this delurking is a bit “woe is me, is anyone reading my blog?” Thanks for being so candid. You calling me Tough Guy? Why that?

  9. Chris says:

    Cause it’s funny to call you tough guy.

  10. Gwen says:

    So you can feel more popular? Isn’t that the reason? But seriously, nothing makes me feel less popular than asking for people to de-lurk and then having NO ONE do it. Really? I have no lurkers? Well, shiiiiit.

  11. Marriage-101 says:

    I do it for my own egotistical purposes. I like to see my comments go up because I like to know people are reading. Why blog if no one is reading? My stat counter is a piece so I don’t trust it.

  12. brandy says:

    Meh. I get what you are saying (and in the past have made the same argument in support of lurkers) but sometimes for me, when I get a dramatic increase in hits, I like having a glimpse at who’s out there. So I can look at their sites. It’s just curiosity I guess.

  13. brandy says:

    And there should have been more periods and less commas in that comment. Forgive me, I am tired.

  14. brandy says:

    And I’m thinking I must really be in your bad books- I talked of Tom Cruise AND delurking in the same week. Perhaps I should do a meme and go for the trifecta.

  15. egan says:

    Chris – good thing you’re not threatening my manhood.
    Gwen – but, but, but you have the best stories and you’re a damn fine writer. Screw how many people come by and visit.
    Marriage 101 – okay, here we go. Let’s see about this. So by asking someone to delurk and comment on your blog, this gives you an ego boost? Couldn’t you artificially inflate your ego (like I do) by responding to each commenter? That’s a great way to make yourself feel more important without the pesky Delurk post. You’re telling me you do the Delurk post to increase your traffic? Aren’t those lurkers already on your blog? StatCounter and SiteMeter are evil. P.S. don’t take this post as an attack on you. It’s something I’ve wondered about long before I discovered your blog.

  16. egan says:

    Brandy – talk about Tom Cruise all you want. Do as many memes as you want. I’m still going to read your blog because a) you’re Canadian b) you’re wicked funny c) you love Kokanee d) you’re a teacher e) because you care f) you give good comment
    Do I need any more reasons? I think not. You’re always in good standing with me Brandy, for what it’s worth. I do like your point about discovering new blogs. That totally makes sense. However, couldn’t you find that out simply by using SiteMeter instead of dedicating a post to it? Just saying.

  17. liv says:

    you right, egan. there’s not a reason in the world that people should have to say anything. sometimes i can relate at no level, and the other phenomenon i encounter even in reading my beloveds’ blogs is that sometimes my beloveds are really deep and intellectual and my pea brain cannot wrap itself around the stuff enough to intelligently comment. ya dig?
    mostly, i think people who encourage delurking do it as a means to network and make friends.

  18. egan says:

    Liv – the networking aspect of the delurk post makes total sense. My thinking is those reading that truly enjoy what you have to say would comment, maybe I’m wrong about that. I know what you mean about the intelligent posts which leave one shaking their head. I read (skim) some of those and hope there’s some picture in the post I can comment on instead. That’s how I roll.

  19. brandy says:

    I probably could use sitemeter. But then I wouldn’t be able to write posts with the word DELURK in capitals. And I really can’t miss out on that.

  20. Diane Mandy says:

    Lurkers don’t bother me at all and I am guilting of lurking way too often. However, when I see the same lurkers in my stats month after month, it does make me curious to know who they are.

  21. sprizee says:

    Version A: Lots of people post about their lurkers in the hopes that new people will comment. More because they’re hoping to see who’s reading it and get some feedback.
    Verson B: People are asking the delurkers to comment because they don’t like people reading their public blog and not commenting. (Hint: It’s PUBLIC blog and if they want to control who’s reading it they should put a password on it.)
    I have a feeling version A is probably more common that version B.
    Don’t get me started on the pot stirring bloggers that regularly post a hot topic and then pose questions to get a virtual town hall meeting started. I kid, I kid. I think you’re penchant for debate is one of my favorite things about your online persona.

  22. ms chica says:

    I never tried to get readers to delurk. When I first started blogging I obsessed over stats and comment numbers. I thought higher numbers would validate the blog, but it began to negatively influence the content, so I quit.
    But in answer to the question you asked…the only concern I have about people lurking is if it’s a close friend or family member, and I don’t know about it. If they know me in life and lurked, it would feel invasive.

  23. tori says:

    I didn’t do the delurk thing because I figured if someone wanted to comment, they would. I don’t give a crap who reads my blog as long as no one is nasty to me in my comments. It is always nice to make new friends though. If I did the delurk thing I would have done it out of curiousity. (this sounds sort of like the title to that OJ book)

  24. CAPTCHA is my bi-atch says:

    This post makes me giggle. I’m not sure why.
    Here’s a question that I’m going to pose for you. Don’t take it the wrong way (always a warning bell when someone says that, eh?). When was the last time that you had a post with just a handful of comments? And not counting posts that you post and then immediately cover up with a new post. You get a lot of comments, yo! Sometimes you get so many comments that you can’t even respond to them all.
    I can’t speak for everyone, but I know that from my experience, it was sad and lonely when you had only 1…or worse, no comments. I think asking for people to “delurk” is their way of asking for validation that people are really reading and appreciating what you have put out there in the public.
    With that being said, I also believe some do it because having their blog and lots of people visiting/commenting gives them revenue (remember our little friend?). Or they do it because they have control issues and spend way too much time checking their stats on sitemeter or statcounter. But, I think the majority of the people just want to feel the love. Don’t we all?

  25. CAPTCHA is my bi-atch says:

    Also. I just want you to know that I now have INXS stuck in my head
    Mystify me

  26. CAPTCHA is my bi-atch says:

    Why don’t you ever comment on my blog anymore? Why am I not on your blogroll?
    OH! OH! OH! I think you should talk about the politics of blogrolls next. Pretty please? With a cherry on top?

  27. CAPTCHA is my bi-atch says:

    Also, I want to point out that when I blogged I never asked for people to delurk. I was too self-conscience about it and felt too needy doing it.
    But I get why others do. That’s where I was going with my first comment. The other side of the fence. I do that…see both sides. Ya know?

  28. CAPTCHA is my bi-atch says:

    Typepad likes me today! It really likes me! Whoopee!

  29. CAPTCHA is my bi-atch says:

    Shit. I spoke too soon. ruyfp6…have I told you that I love CAPTCHA? I’m not a robot, dammit!
    Ok, my reign of terror is now ending. Peace out, yo.

  30. Pants says:

    Delurking takes all the fun out of stalking.

  31. qt says:

    I don’t mind lurkers – I just get worried that some content is being read by less-than-honorable people who are waiting to leave me rude, ignorant comments. I would rather have someone read and leave in disgust without commenting than do that!
    As for me, there are PLENTY of blogs I read without commenting on – but I read them every time they post.

  32. Jennifer says:

    I can see why the delurking thing would be mystifying to someone who gets 11,000 comments per post. However for someone like me who gets 5 or 6 or 12 but has 200 people spending hours reading my blog, it’s mostly a curiousity issue. If you are reading that much or that often, why not say hello? Is it because I suck and you’re coming over to get your heehaws? Or is it because you know me and don’t want me to know you know? Or is it because you’re spending hours meticulously printing off my posts page by page to use for your own nefarious purposes? Stop the paranoia…just say hi once in a while.

  33. meno says:

    I did the delurking thing last year, when i was newer and, frankly, i wanted the affirmation, plus i was curious. This year, i don’t care.
    Re: answering all your comments, i do that too, and i LOVE that you do it. I have had at least 10 people tell me that they like it too. That’s where the “community” aspect ccmes in, with that dialouge.

  34. Lynda says:

    I use to comment on every post of every blog I read to let people know I was there. I just don’t have the time to comment that much anymore. However, I know some people define how good or bad a post is by how many comments they get. Heck, I have found myself pondering if anyone is reading from time to time.

  35. egan says:

    Brandy – don’t change who you are and stop making me stroke your ego.
    Diane Mandy – I suppose it would make you curious. Since I don’t pay attention to SiteMeter anymore, I don’t get caught up in the numbers. I blog for me, end of story.
    Sprizee – are you calling me a pot stirrer? I asked a question I’m sure that’s on the mind of others as blog after blog was featuring delurking posts last week. You’re the one who got me started in all this blogging mess to begin with.
    Ms. Chica – you make a great point here about family. I was also obsessed about site traffic for about two months. It nearly drove me to drink, so I stopped obsessing. You think it would be invasive if someone read your public blog without your knowlege? You’re anonymous right?
    Tori – I love your sensiblities. Nobody better be mean to Tori or else they will get a foot in their ass. That’s your new slogan.
    Captcha Woman – yes, I remember that Snay dude. What a tool he was. You could tell he just wanted to get as many bloggers as possible to view his site. That’s when ads on blogs is a bad thing. That Snay guy was a real bitch.
    So the point you’re trying to make is since I have many comments, delurking isn’t necessary? Am I hearing you right? Interesting enough the blogs which post delurking entries seem plenty popular to me. I suppose I get the validation thing, but why not return the love? Post something, read another blog or two, comment, and hope they return the favor. I could be wrong, but most bloggers are pretty good about returning the comment favor.
    Captcha Bitch – Pretty Vegas. You didn’t just ask me to comment on your blog did you? Hmmm… no comment. Politics of the blogroll? Been there, done that! Now stop teasing me before post a URL at the top of this post. You were a good blogger, there’s no need to be self-conscience.
    Pants – I couldn’t agree more. Lurking is what makes blogging great if you ask me. A glimpse into someone’s life (whatever it is they are sharing) is what hooked me. I’m not kidding either.
    QT – see, you’re the anti-delurker! I like it. I don’t get many of those ignorant comments you mentioned. Do the nasty comments get under your skin? Sometimes I like them since they really make me justify my beliefs.
    Jennifer – I don’t get 11,000 comments per post. You and your wild exaggerations. You don’t suck no matter if someone leaves a comment or not. Don’t let comment numbers deceive. Some of the best blogs have the fewest readers. I’m not sure what that says about my own, but you get my drift. You could end the paranoia by not checking your site stats, yet I’m sure you already know this. And yes, I still dig you despite the tone of my comment.
    Meno – responding to comments is the best part. It creates a dialogue and allows me to hear many different opinions on various topics. Cheers to you too!
    Lynda – see, that’s where it’s all wrong. A blog with very few comments might be someone who has limited time on the net. It does NOT reflect the quality of the content on the blog. I have a desk job so I can track comments and read new posts. Some folks don’t have that luxury so they blog for maybe 15 minutes at the end or beginning of the day.

  36. CAPTCHA is my bi-atch says:

    I love it that you called me “Captcha Bitch”….reading that made me snort. And Jennifer is close…you did get 300 comments one day. I don’t remember how, though….hmmm…
    Anyway – I was just putting it out there that perhaps it was a bit more mystifying to you, a person who receives a lot of comments, than it is for others who are maybe not so….popular? (and I hate using teh word popular, even though that’s what you are). Just giving you another perspective on it is all.
    Because, really, isn’t that what blogging is all about?
    And, for the record, I totally agree with you about the sharing of the love. I truly believe that the reason you have so many loyal readers/commenters is because you go out and get them. You don’t just sit back and ask them to come to you with a delurking post. You read other people’s blog and comment on them and they in turn do the same for you. And you also initiate conversation and dialogue within your comments. And I believe that is the key and the secret to get loyal readership.

  37. egan says:

    Captcha Bitch – your like the student that sits in the front row and makes the teacher very proud. Well done. We all have to start a blog from somewhere. Comments don’t just magically appear. That being said, I know many bloggers aren’t interested (or don’t have the time) to generate heaps of comments.
    What’s important to keep in mind though, blog comments do not equate to a good or bad blog. Many of the better blogs I read get a handful of comments at best.
    I got 300 comments because roughly five crazy women went to town with comments on my blog. I think I somehow pissed them off by turning off the comments right at 299, oh the humanity. Now I’m curious what the topic was that day. Can you get on that?

  38. Golden says:

    I’m totally guilty of Lurking.. but you already know that about me. And I have nothing else to say about that. But, I did want to mention..OMG..the new baby pics.. I didn’t think it was possible..but she just keeps getting cuter.

  39. egan says:

    Golden – once her cheeks get wider you will stop saying she’s cute. I know it will happen some day. She’s very near. You crazy lurker you. Technically you’re not a lurker since you leave comments.

  40. Tim says:

    I agree. If people want to comment they will.

  41. egan says:

    Tim – hells yeah… oh, the ultrasound is complete. Two more weeks.

  42. Airam says:

    We’ve talked of this. You know my thoughts. Too tired to write more.

  43. egan says:

    Airam – are you calling it pandering?

  44. JQ says:

    I sometimes lurk, but only when I have nothing to say. I usually have at least some stupid thing to say….okay all the things I say are stupid, so what.
    I don’t mind lurkers. What I do mind is being punched in the testicles.
    I also don’t care for jamming a pencil into my eye socket.
    I could go on but I think I have proven my point.

  45. Jennifer says:

    Wild exaggerations are just an attention getting mechanism. Sort of like de-lurking days. 😉
    And I still dig you, too, you meanie.

  46. ms chica says:

    For SOMEONE to read my anonymous public blog without my knowledge, I could care less…For my sister, or my spouse’s family to nose around looking for dirt is a different story.
    It’s refreshing to build a community with strangers. You get a clean slate and no one holds all the awful crap that you did when you were eleven against you.
    My four-legged partner is anonymous, but family knows about his site and visit regularly, hence no link from his site to mine…

  47. Maggie says:

    I admit that as mentioned above, I like comments because of the affirmation that someone is actually reading the drivel I inject into this blogworld. However, I have never asked anyone to delurk, mainly because I’m lazy and never know when national delurk day is and also because I would be a hypo-crite for asking since I read a lot of blogs or posts and don’t comment. Some days I just feel too dumb to think of anything to say, others I don’t relate to the post I guess. That’s my long-winded blather.

  48. Maggie says:

    Fudgamegaster! Damn thing ate my super long-winded comment gardamit.
    1. I like comments because it feeds my ego that someone reads my drivel.
    2. I don’t ask people to delurk because then I would be a hypo-crite. I don’t always comment because some days I feel too dumby to think of anything to say or I just don’t relate to the post.
    Let’s try this here Post button again.

  49. Maggie says:

    Great now I’m blathering AND getting succinct. I can’t figure out how to delete one of myselves there so I’m guessing you’re stuck with all my wordy goodness.

  50. Airam says:

    Excuse me while I look up the word … meh, no need. You know my thoughts on this. Man do you ever. Poor you.

  51. sizzle says:

    i am intrigued as to who my “lurkers” are but i’ve never done a delurking post. i figure if they want to comment, they will. they must read for a reason. though some, i suspect, are actually stalking me!
    😉 jk

  52. Eunice says:

    If I didn’t want the whole world to be able to read my blog and have the choice to comment or not, I would blog on MySpace and set the damn thing to private.
    I’m just sayin’.

  53. Golden says:

    The bigger her cheeks get the better!! (That sounds… weird…) Anyway, I would love to visit her sometime, since she is very near… If you bring her to the place we both inhabit for certain hours of the day, let me know so I can ooh and ahh over her.

  54. SSC says:

    if people didn’t care they wouldn’t install the stat counter. That allows you to see how many people view your blog and yada yada yada. I became too obsessed trying to figure everything out. I mainly got it to see if I had any hits.
    Because no one would comment on my blog for awhile and then I realized I was hit by delurkers!!!!! I took my stat counter off and I just blog to blog not caring if anyone reads it.
    But you have to admit getting a comment, is like hearing AOL say, ” You’ve got mail!”
    ADMIT Egan, ADMIT it!!!!!!

  55. brookem says:

    We talked about this recently so I guess you already know what I think about it all.
    I figure the people who want to comment, will. I read a lot of blogs and don’t comment, and if prompted to “de-lurk,” I might not do it. I, like you, read some blogs and just have nothing to comment on; but I’ll still read. I think there’s other ways to get to know your readers than doing a de-lurk post. To each his own I guess.
    I may or may not have been one of those 5 crazy ladies who contributed to the record 300 comment post. And I’m proud of it.

  56. Amanda says:

    I love receiving comments, especially from regular readers. Of course, new readers are also fun because it leads me to their blogs. But I definitely understand why people wouldn’t leave comments….I often fine it hard to do too even though I love reading through blog after blog.
    I try to remind myself that I blog because I like to and not because people like me to.

  57. Cake Lady says:

    It doesn’t bother me if someone reads my blog and doesn’t comment. I don’t comment unless I have something to say. How do these delurkers know who is not leaving a comment? Do they virtually stalk them and leave a comment about why didn’t you leave a comment? I say they have too much time on their hands.

  58. SSC says:

    Sorry trying not to be delurking!!!!!

  59. I think someone invented it to collect more comments.
    Oh and your anti-de-lurking post is a turn-on.

  60. CAPTCHA is my bi-atch says:

    You edited your comment. That cracks me up.
    I’m not sure what the topic was that day. Or what even sparked the whole wanting to try to get 300 comments. I can’t even remember what day it was. It was before Anna was born, I do know that. And were there 5 of us…I mean…were there 5 crazy ladies? Yeah…I suppose there were now that I think about it! I don’t know if they were necessarily pissed off when you turned off comments at 299. Maybe…maybe unfulfilled is a better word for it. At least…I know it was that way for one person. Ahem.
    And, hmmm…I think I may have just compared commenting to getting ones rocks off. Wow…I may have had bigger issues than I thought.

  61. SSC says:

    If I see an attractive outfit on a man or woman I will look at them. So will you and other people. People really don’t mean they don’t give a crap, please don’t lie people.
    I will look the person I am admiring up and down. In a not noticeable fashion as working in HR for 7 years has taught me how to be discrete.
    I might be adoring the outfit she has on and pandering if I would look good in it. Or if I see a man in a suit, I look for cuff lings and the tie. I wonder if he dressed himself or if his wife dressed him by laying out the outfit to make sure he was color coordinated.
    If I see an outrageously crazy outfit that should not be worn I have kept my comments to myself until the person has left to discuss amongst the rest of us hens.

  62. SSC says:

    I meant to say pondering, Pondering not pandering, not pandering!!! Oh dear God!!!!

  63. CAPTCHA is my bi-atch says:

    OMG, E-Fo. I found the post. It is from August – I think right when Mrs. L started dialating. It seems so long ago!
    Anyway, I totally just read through the ALL of the comments (why? I don’t know…) and almost peed myself. We were slightly out of control that day. But there is some hella funny shit going on in those comments. Ahhh…the good ole days.

  64. egan says:

    JQ – getting punched in the nards sucks. Has that son of yours kicked you there yet?
    Jennifer – you do make a great point as always. I bow to you and all your greatness.
    Ms Chica – the family thing I get. I’m just curious how they found it. What did you do when you were eleven? And, are you coming to town or what?
    Maggie – I catch your drift. I know I’ve stumbled across blogs with zero comments and wondered if anyone reads them. Blather on I say.
    Maggie – your inner monologue is one of the best. I’m glad you brought it to my blog. Your first comment did come through, but now you gave me three comments for the price of one. Not a bad thing.
    Maggie – with TypePad you can’t delete comments and I’m not in the mood to delete since you referenced them. I am stuck with you.
    Airam – you lurker you! Lurking is a bit different than perving, keep that in mind.
    Sizzle – we shouldn’t joke about stalkers based on where you live. Don’t we all blog to feed our precious egos? Wait, you didn’t say anything about that. My bad.
    Eunice – don’t go to MySpace. Only hosers have MySpace sites, yes I do have one.
    Golden – I will have to bring her by work some day. Or I can gaze through the windows like many adults do and try to find her.
    Bemused – you raise an interesting point. What is the difference between a lurker and a stalker? Do you know a stalker and not a lurker? I feel you on the “nice post” thing. If I blog about Anna enough, people feel the same way. “She’s cute” comments become the norm.
    SSC – yes, getting comments does feel good. That’s why I like to return the favor as often as possible. Stat Counter™ is evil.
    Brookem – thanks to our pal Armie, I now know what that 300+ comment post was about. Guess what, it was about Anna’s pending arrival. I should have remembered that. Hey, how was the movie with mom?
    Amanda – that’s exactly it, you blog for yourself. I admit I don’t leave comments on all the posts I read either. Sometimes I take a quick glance to see how long the post is and then read or come back later.
    Cake Lady – now that’s funny, too much time on their hands. You do realize your audience is bloggers right? We have way too much time on our hands.
    SSC – ha, very funny. Comment away.
    Emmaenlighted – the great thing I can post something like this and get a shitload of comments.
    Captch Bitch – yep, it was a few days before Anna was born. I love that you compared commenting to sex. Well done. “unfulfilled” is a great way to phrase that little 299 comment thing. Armie, I miss you!
    SSC – you meant to comment on a different post didn’t you? Anyways, interesting that you check the guy to see if his wife dressed him. I think I’m guilty of doing the same. So you’re in HR eh? Noted.
    Captcha Bitch – I started to reread that post too and only made it halfway through the comments. Wow, that sure as hell does seem like a long time ago. On one hand I can remember it like it was yesterday.

  65. mez says:

    I lurk at quite a few journals with no intention of commenting so I can’t really ask people to delurk on my journal can I? Or can I? Well I did a few years ago at my other journal and NO ONE DELURKED – and yet I could see them all there in my stats silently laughing at me.
    I ask you, am I scary or something?

  66. naynayfazz says:

    Please forgive me; maybe I am slow or something but I don’t get what you mean. How does one “delurk” someone?
    I guess people, myself included see comments as a way of stamping, “I was here” to your blog. I usually always comment on people’s blog because I enjoy doing it. I am not going to be mad if people don’t comment.

  67. M says:

    Says the guy who shamed me for not commenting the other day!
    Apples! Them! How do you like??
    I always wrote with the assumption that my blog was public. Lurk at will, says me.

  68. Lynn says:

    Although blogs are public, I felt creeped out when one of my cousins commented on the phone to me about something that I had blogged about…I had no idea that she read my blog.

  69. Lynn says:

    Something is going on with Typepad tonight…It ate my comment too. (and it was a brillant comment I might add). As far as delurking…I had a cousin who, during a phone conversation, commented on something that she read on my blog…I had no idea that she read my blog and it was kind of creepy.

  70. egan says:

    Mez – you are NOT scary. I think some folks just don’t feel like commenting sometimes. I wouldn’t read anything more into it than that. I adore that you refer to blogs as “journals”.
    Naynayfazz – well they usually request their anonymous readers to delurk. Nobody can force them to comment though. They may or may not do so as Mez commented right above you. Comments can act as a stamp to show you read the post, but sometimes I guess there’s not always something to add.
    M – hey, I gave you a bad time about not posting by leaving a comment. That’s so different than lurking mon amie. Catch my drift? How do you like them apples?
    Lynn – I will admit it’s caught me off guard a few times when someone in my personal life brings up something off the blog. It’s not that I hide from it, but my mind goes “oh yeah, that’s right I did tell them about it”. In the case of your cousin, I’d be creeped out too.
    Lynn – it got your comment… you have to hit the link at the bottom to see comments 50+. Or you might be forced to refresh to see the comment. TypePad added some spam filter that has been catching comments.

  71. Zen says:

    I was puzzled as to why you left blogger for the slow commenting feature but now it all makes sense. I rarely read a blog without commenting on something because I want others to reciprocate. If I wrote for my own amusement, I’d save them in Word on my laptop. I like the comments to help guage whether or not what I said was compelling.

  72. Joe says:

    Couldn’t agree more. I’ve always wondered how people get offended by others looking at a public site. It’s not like they’re looking in your bedroom window. Unless, of course, you post a webcam link on your blog. Then it’s your own fault.
    Mind if I liknk to this on my blog at some point?

  73. egan says:

    Bemused – I think Typepad isn’t showing the comment right away like it used to. I have to refresh after about ten seconds before I see my own comments, et voilà!
    Thanks for the clarification between the two; lurking vs. stalking. That’s a great way to look at it. Roger that on the comment thing too. Sometimes you just nod and move on.
    Zen – thanks for the visit. Would you like a $50 VS gift certificate for your troubles? A few years ago Blogger would stumble after you hit the Post button and many comments were lost. It got old fast. This was shortly after Blogger was purchased by Google.
    Joe – link away if you want. Thanks for commenting on this topic. I wouldn’t want you to become a “lurker” type. Webcams are so 2004.

  74. Michael says:

    Okay, this is the first time I’ve actually taken the time to come on over here, so it’s possible you could describe me as almost kinda sorta having lurked by proxy by hanging out at Chris’s blog semi-regularly for a couple of years.
    Anyways, I’m going to link you. Be proud, young man. I find very few blogs I want to link these days…
    …and I’ve never posted about Tom Cruise except to point out that the very idea of him and Katie Holmes combining to form Tomkat is very much along the same lines as the kind of thinking that creates those giant Power Rangers baddies.
    Which is totally true, when you think about it.

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