Your Guess is as Good as Mine

This much I know is true:  You like bullet point posts.  You like pictures of my daughter.  You like blogging.  You like movies about gladiators.   You like sexual innuendos.  Since my last post didn't really relate to anyone, I will attempt to please you all with some fun numbers about things in my life. 

  • I'd estimate I wince at least 75% of the time when I enter the men's bathroom at work.
  • 8 bags of yard waste were left for the Waste Management truck today, that's a lot of grass clippings, weeds, and food scraps. 
  • Since December of 2006, I've thrown zero rocks at cars.  When I was roughly seven (and testing my boundaries) I threw rocks at a couple cars before getting busted by one of the drivers.  I never did it again.  I like to throw things, what can I say. 
  • 9488 – the last four digits of my childhood phone number.
  • I've personally owned two cars in my life: 1986 Honda Accord and a 1993 Geo Prizm.  My wife and I have jointly owned two cars.
  • We're 23 days away from the day my wife and I met in 1998, that's ten years of knowing one another!
  • I have about 15 dress shirts hanging in our cramped closet.  I avoid wearing them because I'm really lazy when it comes to ironing stuff.  I'm an Ironman (just had to throw that in there).
  • When I graduated from college, I had 57 more credits than one needed to graduate from college.  Then again my grade point average wasn't so stellar.
  • 42.5 miles per gallon, got to love the Prius.
  • The first time I got drunk I was 17 and it was following a state swim meet.  I had two cans of beer which I fished out of a hotel bathtub.
  • I've been pulled over by a cop four times and ticketed twice.  Both were speeding infractions.  Once I fell asleep at the wheel, making the cop think I was drunk and requiring a breathalizer exam.  I've never fallen asleep at the wheel since that night in 1997.
  • My mom considers me her numero uno son, no disrepect to my underperforming siblings.

About lessinges

Seattle native, discovering life! I like ice cream, cold cereal, and The Amazing Race.
This entry was posted in Blog Fodder, Humans are Good, Raging Dork, Science. Bookmark the permalink.

35 Responses to Your Guess is as Good as Mine

  1. meno says:

    Why do you wince when wandering where the men wee?

  2. egan says:

    Meno – because the sanitation level is so poor. I know it’s to be a bit expected, but in our office it should be better. Hell, we entertain guests here. I never once smelled a cleaning product odor in our bathrooms, not once. I’ve been here almost seven years.

  3. Maggie says:

    statistically speaking, you’re a rather fun guy. But that’s just the statistics speaking…

  4. Pants says:

    I like that you have two solid years without throwing rocks at cars. You best stay away from Utah…the drivers would push you over the edge.
    I’m my dad’s numero uno daughter. Can’t help that I’m likeable.

  5. Darlene says:

    I’m my dad’s numero uno as well – however, I’m the only daughter, so that doesn’t say much.
    A Prius, huh? I KNEW IT!!!
    Thanks for the bullet point look into your life. :o)

  6. TriVortex says:

    I’m my parents’ number one son. I’m the only son, but I’m still number one.
    A Prius…have you ever heard of Jeff Dunham? Youtube his clips.

  7. Darlene says:

    I’m my dad’s numero uno as well – however, I’m the only daughter, so that doesn’t say much.
    A Prius, huh? I KNEW IT!!! You have to see Jeff Dunham’s comedy routine about his Prius.
    Thanks for the bullet point look into your life. :o)

  8. Cheryl says:

    I consider myself my mother’s numero uno child. 🙂
    1073–last digits of childhood phone number…

  9. LOL, I hope your siblings don’t read this, mine would kill me if I wrote that!
    I’ve been pulled over five times, ticketed once. It pays to be a girl. 🙂

  10. Cazzie says:

    I giggled when I got to your last point, your siblings read this blog? LOL

  11. Amanda says:

    Well that definitely was a fun post! How do you manage to remember the exact day you met your wife?

  12. Sicilian Mama says:

    I do like movies about gladiators! How did you know?
    I’m allergic to ironing. If I find something I want to wear that needs ironed, I beg my husband to do it. Which he gladly does (because he’s cool like that). It’s also why I try to buy shirts that don’t wrinkle. I’ve also been known to just say screw it and wear a wrinkled shirt. Because, honestly? I really don’t give a fuck and by the time I’ve had it on for about an hour, the wrinkles are mostly gone.

  13. Matt says:

    Very interesting, and completely random information about you!
    Yet another great post!

  14. Nilsa says:

    Your rock throwing incident reminds me of my kicking incident as a kid. I used to kick one of the girls on my block because she thought she knew everything and bossed me around. And so I’d kick her. Until her dad came out and gave me a VERY stern warning about what he’d do to me if I kept kicking her. I never did kick her again. Good life lesson, wouldn’t you say?!

  15. justrun says:

    10 years? Nice!
    Does your mom tell all the kids that? Hmmm…

  16. tori says:

    When my kids were little, we had this kitchen set thing for them to play with. My mother in law was over once, and my daughter picked up the fake iron, held it up and said “what is this?”.
    I hate to iron too, obviously.

  17. kelwhy says:

    i consider you my numero uno son as well – just sayin’…

  18. sprizee says:

    You also excel at stirring the pot. Oh, I guess you already kind of listed that when you went a declare yourself #1 SON on a blog that other members of your familia read. Remind me to buy you that mug sometime.

  19. JLee says:

    Thank you for these fun facts! ha
    I think it’s cool you’ve only owned 2 cars…I’ve had a bazillion.

  20. ms chica says:

    My mom still has the same phone number we had when I was a kid, but I’m not gonna share cause I don’t want any savvy readers drunk dialing her at 2AM.

  21. Big Bro says:

    I knew you sucked at Spanish!
    You meant “dos” my dear brother…:-)

  22. Lynn says:

    Wincing gives you wrinkles.
    At 42.5 mpg, I now definitely have Prius envy.

  23. ubermilf says:

    Is this you?
    You look great for a guy in his 50’s.

  24. egan says:

    Maggie – I love statistics, well I did when I was a baseball junkie. I’m not so much a baseball fan these days so I probably don’t care for stats so much. In fact, I took a stats class in college and I didn’t care for it all that much. So there you have it.
    Pants – oops, it has been more than two years without throwing rocks at cars. I’m glad you called me on that. I worded the post rather poorly. Damn right you’re number one. It’s good to see you’re not bashful.
    Darlene – why did you know I drove a Prius? I have mentioned it several times on here. We bought one back in December and I couldn’t be more pleased. It’s a fantastic car. You’re an only child eh?
    TriVortex – I hadn’t heard of Jeff Dunham until the comments on this post. I watched his YouTube clip and I have mixed sentiments. I guess I’m never a fan of gay jokes, but to each their own.
    Cheryl – how many times has that area code changed? My mom still has the exact same seven digit number with only one area code change.
    EmmaEnlighted – ha, not only does it pay to be a girl, but it pays to have a cookie for a face. My brother does read this blog, only one of them. The others hardly know what the internet is all about. Hey, look at how well Spain is doing in Euro 2008.
    Cazzie – one sibling reads this blog and he claims I’m number two. Hogwash I say. He was just born before me, but I’m the one with the cool curly hair.
    Amanda – well that’s a fantastic question. I remember the exact date because I’m a numbers junkie and because it happened to be: my friend’s birthday and my other friend’s wedding day. July 18th, my Best Man’s birthday and the day I met my wife. How cool is that?
    Sicilian Mama – do you also like your coffee black? If I hang a collared shirt, does it straighten itself? Sadly it does not. One thing I refuse to iron, jeans. I do iron my tighty whities though.
    Matt – thanks for the kind comment. All I can say is that I try.
    Nilsa – that is some life lesson. Here’s my question to you since we’re on the topic of kicking. Do girls kick girls in the groin like boys do? I mean you don’t have the same parts we do… you know.
    Justrun – nope, she only tells me I’m the bestest kid. The others all play second fiddle. I’m like Chris Martin of Coldplay. Does anyone really give a shit about the other band members?
    Tori – that’s a perfect story. I bet a similar story will happen with Anna. Ironing is for losers.
    Kelwhy – shall I call you mom?
    Sprizee – that’s the fun in calling myself the best child of the litter. My brother did take the opportunity to chime in.
    JLee – yeah, I personally have only owned two cars. Since my wife has better credit than me and makes more money, the last two cars have officially been acquired in her name. Go me.
    Ms. Chica – yep, my mom still has the same digits too, with only one area code change. Her number is the easiest one to remember too. Oh the memories of prank calling/drunk dialing.
    Big Bro – nope, I meant what I said, UNO. You’re just lucky you were born before me. I learned a bunch of stuff from all of you older siblings. Let’s just say I learned from your mistakes and am now ready to take over the world.
    Lynn – you should have Prius Envy. Seriously, it’s a really good car. I would go as far as to say it’s the best car I’ve ever driven. Very comfortable, handles great, has all the creature comforts one might want, doesn’t pollute much, good mileage, and spacious back seats. Don’t be fooled by its different appearance.
    Ubermilf – ha, that’s not me. You do have me wondering though. See there’s a well known author named Timothy Egan who actually lives in my hood and does compete in triathlons. I don’t think he ever goes by the name Tim though. I can’t even imagine how fucked up it would be to crash into a bear while tearing down a mountain on your bike. Wow.

  25. Sicilian Mama says:

    Holy cow – black coffee is the best. Especially when it’s from a diner…oh man. I totally want a cup of coffee now. Which I could totally have if I wanted, but apparently the little one prefers water and hot cocoa.
    And whatever – we all know you go commando. Iron your tighty whities…ha!

  26. egan says:

    Sicilian Mama – yes, have some coffee. People drink wine throughout pregnancy and the kids seem fairly normal when they make their grand arrival. One cup of coffee isn’t going to hurt Little Torsten.
    I do NOT go commando ever. Let’s keep that straight for all those new readers. Never!

  27. Sicilian Mama says:

    If I name my child Torsten, then people may think I really have been drinking the liquors during my pregnancy. Wow…that’s a new one. Torsten…yeah, it doesn’t work for me.
    Sometimes I go bra-commando. That’s pretty comfortable AND awesome.

  28. Sicilian Mama says:

    You know what name is cool? Havret. I think I may have to throw that one into the hat for consideration.

  29. egan says:

    Sicilian Mama – I don’t get why you don’t like Torsten. I went to high school with a guy named Torsten and he was hot. Sans bra? You’re a freak!
    Sicilian Mama – Havret and Hugo, add them to your list. I also like Smithers.

  30. SSC says:

    10 years congratulations for both you and your wife. More for your wife putting up with you. You haven’t thrown things since 2006? Egan I don’t know what to say!

  31. cdp says:

    I usually wince upon entering the mens room at work as well.

  32. Big Bro says:

    Funny thing you ,numero dos or treis, might have forgotten as well, is that your childhood digits weren’t always 9488….our number was changed a ways back, but you were just a wee whippersnapper then, maybe 5 or 6 or so, but your childhood digits were….3588. Go ask mom (and see what shes says on both accounts! :-)…

  33. egan says:

    SSC – it has been more than 2 years. I really need to reword this post because several people have been confused by my rock throwing. I was only making a joke.
    CDP – what are you doing going into the men’s bathroom? Don’t you have a man? Finding one in the bathroom isn’t the way to do it. Maybe that was a bad way to phrase it.
    BigBro – whose Spanish skills suck? Come on mensch, you must know how to spell three in Spanish. Now you’ve really exposed why I’m the vastly superior child in the family. 3588 happened before I could see so you can’t fault me. 3588 is dead to me! Mom knows for a fact I’m the best. I’m talent and a whole lot more.

  34. qt says:

    Dude – I absolutely don’t iron – ever. I don’t even own and ironing board or an iron. Thank god for the dry cleaners.

  35. egan says:

    QT – dude, we’re like siblings with this lack of ironing. It bores me and makes getting dressed troublesome.

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