What is the opposite of chocolate? I’m convinced it’s brussel sprouts. Damn, it could be coleslaw too. Who eats coleslaw and why? That is vile food and it has the tendency to do wicked things to the body. Whenever a restaurant gives me a side of coleslaw, I wonder why. Is anyone eating coleslaw? If you’re one of the few who enjoys coleslaw or brussel sprouts tell me why. I know it can’t be related to the smell before it goes in your body or when it comes out…. oops.
Bring it! I’m in the middle of a Twitter vs. Facebook war. It isn’t pretty, but I thought I could share some of the highlights.
Before Facebook: I searched for people’s photos using approved search engines. I avoided snowball and food fights in person. I disliked getting Poked. I wrote, read, and commented on blogs. I didn’t have to fight for the computer. I didn’t have to explain my stubborn emoticon rules. I didn’t obsess about Status Updates. I thought I was a good Scrabble player. I thought I had a lot of Friends. I thought I was loved (see evidence below)
I’m so perplexed by the things you post. Does your wife think you are cute/funny when you write about your bodily functions? I’m really grossed out when I read about you needing to poop, having a boner, etc. I just wouldn’t expect it from a 35yo married father! Call me a prude, goodie-goodie or whatever you want. I just felt compelled to let you know I’m going to remove you so I don’t have your posts popping up. Feel free to email me anytime, I just don’t want to read that stuff. Sorry Egan! Please don’t be mad. I do hope you’ll stay in touch…
One and a third –> believe it or not folks. My daughter is one and a third years old today. I know it’s not really a birthday most tend to celebrate. However most people don’t tend to get hooked on Facebook and chat about their life Before Facebook as if it was a huge milestone. I, however, am not your typical cat. If I keep saying this, there’s no way it can’t be true. Rumor has it 40% of the US population between the ages of 19-39 have a tattoo. Guess what, I don’t have one. I’m so cool.
Crikey, back to my daughter. She’s 16 months old today and is learning to play pretend. She removes her bottle bag from the kitchen door knob and leaves the kitchen saying “bye” many times. [exit stage left] She reappears ten seconds later with a huge grin on her face saying “hi” as we welcome her back to the kitchen. It’s damn adorable. Just like all of you bloggers! You’re adorable. Have a fantasically super cool weekend!