So That’s What Foundation is For

It is good to meet people. It is good to dance. It’s good to dance and meet people you might find attractive. See, this is type of thought process which got me in trouble during college. When you’re underage, your nightlife options are stunted.

a) You get a fake ID
b) You go to Canada where the drinking age is 19
c) You go to cheesy underage dance clubs
d) You stay home and study on Friday and Saturday nights

I choose option C often even though I’m terrified of dancing. Well I’m much less terrified now thanks to my appearances on the dance floor during the college years. I used to be so scared of dancing I would hang out on the sides and wish I had the balls to bust a move. With some time I grew a pair and danced and met some fun people. Some I dated, some I was too embarrassed to ask on a date, and some weren’t there for romantic encounters.

One eventful evening, my friend Scott directs me to a table located away from (fake) smoky dance floor. I felt confident that night. There was a guy manning some small card table and he was repping a talent agency. He said all the right things to woo me. Dammit, I went to the club to meet girls and this guy flattered me enough where I attended an informational meeting a few days later. I was swept off my feet by the kind words this guy said about my appearance.

Before I knew it, I decided to enroll in a John Casablancas modeling class which I couldn’t really afford. In fact, it may be the first official item I financed come to think of it… other than college. Not the $500 futon, it was this crazy modeling class. I commuted on the bus to the class weekly where I learned various skills such as: glamorous head shots, walking the catwalk, how to nail a “go see”, dressing with glitz, applying makeup, and how to stop chewing my nails.

Okay, it all seems a bit silly as I describe it here. The ten week program was grueling (a lie), yet it did give me an ego boost. It was a much needed confidence booster considering I was in a bit of a dark place personally. As many of you know, these classes happened shortly after one of my siblings passed away in 1991. These classes got me out of my shell and thinking about the future.

I finished the modeling class and worked on building a portfolio. I paid a sketchy photographer for some head and body shots then attempted to market myself. Nothing really amounted out of this though as I lost interest over the years. However, I must say my knowledge gained allows me to show off Dior turns and makes watching America’s Next Top Model (ANTM for those in the know) much more compelling.

*NOTE: a head shot will be added to this post at a later date


About lessinges

Seattle native, discovering life! I like ice cream, cold cereal, and The Amazing Race.
This entry was posted in Officially Bizarre, Raging Dork, Storytelling, Vanity is Overrated. Bookmark the permalink.

30 Responses to So That’s What Foundation is For

  1. sprizee says:

    I love this post! I just love it SO much! (Yeah, that’s a TBTL reference.)
    Boom, roasted!

  2. The first time I went to a bar or something I was already like 21 and they still have to check my ID because I looked younger than my actual age. Unfortunately, I usually dont carry my ID which was stupid so I end up sneaking at the back door with the help of some people I know.
    I also tried a bit of modelling too.I got signed up when I accompanied a lady friend in a modelling agency.

  3. brandy says:

    Looking forward to the headshot. Also? I need someone to teach me how to take a good photo. Or, at least a photo where both of my eyes are visible. Also? Drinking age HERE is 18. Even better than 19. Hope you are doing well!

  4. churlita says:

    Great post.
    Hey, Ashton Kutcher got discovered in a cheesy underage club in my town. So, it could have worked out for you…If that’s what you had really wanted. looking at all you have now, I bet you’re glad it didn’t work out for you like that.

  5. Chris says:

    How very interesting…you have stories to tell now don’t you.

  6. justrun says:

    Sketchy photographer makes me think of someone who does not collect fees in monetary form. I know, I shouldn’t think that way but it’s just what I do.
    Also, so interesting, Mr. E.

  7. egan says:

    Sprizee – you’re nutso about the Mount Baker radio show, TBTL.
    Charles – oh, we can share some great modeling stories then. Mine aren’t too fascinating since nothing ever developed. So I wasn’t the only one to wait until 21 to hit a bar?
    Brandy – I wouldn’t know about good photos. My friend’s GF is a photographer though. She’s got some great tips I bet, if you got a quarter.
    Churlita – the only thing I’d want to do now is voice work. That would be cool and you can keep your life private.
    Chris – I try sir, I try.
    Justrun – I’m sure there are many photographers like that. I can say I’m happy to have never met any fitting your description. Maybe I should hold off that until you see some of the pictures he took.

  8. Amanda says:

    Ah yes…the days of sneaking into clubs. I like it when it was super crowded so that I could just go in the middle and nobody would see what a horrible dancer I was. So, when is that head shot coming up?

  9. Felisa says:

    As someone who’s underage, I don’t see the appeal of going to Canada to get alcohol. It’s an unnecessary use of gas. I mean, come on…be smarter that that. Make friends who are older than 21! lol. Oh well, I usually pick option D because I have to be at work at 5 in the morning on Saturday and Sunday.
    Does that mean you’ve mastered “smiling with your eyes”? Tyra Banks has convinced me to practice except I just always look like I’m squinting. Haha

  10. emma says:

    So how fierce do you get?

  11. Oh I can’t wait for that head shot! I learn something new everyday from you … but it all makes sense. You do have a cat-walk swagger.

  12. Michelle says:

    Looking forward to the headshot. I think it’s an odd thing to have done, but fun. The stories you can tell…

  13. I don’t have interesting stories either on the modelling subject since it was short-lived one due to school (instead I joined some male pageant contest at school and surprisingly won!). Only my friend who managed to pursue it further but also quit later to work as a flight stewardess.

  14. Can you teah me the Dior turn?

  15. SM says:

    I’ve been reading your blog for over 4 years and I’m still learning new things about you. I love it.

  16. sprizee says:

    It’s not a Mount Baker radio show. Sure, Mr. Luke Burbank lives in that area and hangs out a local coffee shop you frequent. But they air the show from the KIRO offices on Eastlake. Gosh!
    Fun fact. The first time I heard Ben Lee’s Catch My Disease was because of you. Which is the song that TBTL opens with each night. Also, Ben Lee married Ione Sky, the girl from Say Anything. Ok, so that was a bunch of factS, possibly fun. Stop looking at me like that.

  17. egan says:

    Amanda – I still get rather paranoid when I’m on the dance floor. I should consider a dance class so I don’t feel so miserable. It’s one of the few times in life I truly feel uncomfortable. The head shot is coming, if I can find the darn portfolio. I searched the house this morning to no avail.
    Felisa – hello and welcome to my blog. Well we didn’t go north of the border with the sole intent of getting drunk and meeting cute ladies. My buddy is from Vancouver so went to see his family, see the sights, and then tear it up on the dance floor. You work at 5am? In my book that’s as crazy as watching Grey’s Anatomy sober. Yes, I’ve mastered smiling with my eyes. I’m heaps talented.
    Emma – are you asking to see my Blue Steel?
    Essentially Me – catwalk swagger? Yikes, I’m not sure if that’s a compliment. Hey, the modeling class was the shiznit. It completed me.
    Michelle – odd in what regard? If you want to model, they need to see how well you photograph. I was sort of gangly so that didn’t help my chances. Skinny guys don’t usually make good models. I had abs, but I wasn’t so cut elsewhere.
    Charles – that’s interesting. It’s a cutthroat industry and was too pushy for me. I’m from Seattle (similar to Norway minus the intense cold) and things are rather chill here.
    Princess Extraordinaire – it’s very complex. If you can do it with a smile on your face, you will be rich. That’s what I was told at least.
    SM – ha, that’s the goal. Don’t worry, I have many gems yet unearthed.
    Sprizee – don’t you like how long they play the song? It’s a catchy song I tell you. Did I make a CD for you with that song on it? I know, it’s not local. I know it’s not recorded in someone’s garage, but we can pretend.

  18. SM says:

    Headshots also are a must if you actually want to get a job as a model (or actor or anything in the entertainment biz). Not odd but rather the norm.
    I like how you save your gems and don’t just spill the beans all at once. You’ll have blog fodder for life this way.

  19. egan says:

    SM – right you are. I mean “rite” you are since they’re pretty much a rite of passage for anything Hollywood-related. You know like acting, photography, or even extra work.
    I am here for you. Just wait until I delve into all that is strip clubs.

  20. SM says:

    I had to have a couple done even for community theatre. They weren’t necessarily “professional” (i took them myself), but they got the job done. Plus, it’s fun to pose for them with serious faces and such. Being all “artistic” and shit.
    Strip clubs…ugh. Yes, that will be interesting to hear your own stories.

  21. big bro says:

    Given your experiences I think you could get Anna onto “toddlers and tiaras” and come home a winner! Both of you! Next time stick to Barbizon for modeling 🙂

  22. egan says:

    SM – it sounds like you get headshots for fun. You do know we’re not talking about drinks right? Yes, strip clubs could be entertaining, but they tend to disappoint.
    Big Bro – Barbizon wasn’t at Skoochies/DV8 that night. It was John Casablancas and I was a sucker.

  23. Matt says:

    I almost did the Barbizon thing in college. What suckers we can be! I knew if I waited long enough, the modelling story would come out. I can just see you yelling at the TV while watching ANTM…

  24. That is true! Seattle is like a sister city to Bergen (the city where I live) due to the plentiful rainfall. Anyway, I am in a tropical country for the time being and be back in Norway probably in weeks time.

  25. SM says:

    Yes, I know you’re not talking about drinks. I was being sarcastic with my comment. I actually hated having to get them done for the plays I’d audition for. It was community theatre not broadway so I’m not sure why they need a headshot, but whatev. They aren’t fun and most of the poses make me laugh hysterically…all serious with their chin propped on their fist looking off in the distance like they are in deep thought. Lame-o.
    oh and if I just described your headshot, sorry about that. I’ll laugh a little quieter next time.

  26. logo™ says:

    Blue steel, baby, work it.
    Btw, Im going to have Right Said Fred stuck in my head now, so thanks for that.

  27. egan says:

    Matt – you almost got suckered too? Phew, I did and felt bad about it. However, looking back it was one of the best things I did for myself back then. I laugh a lot while watching ANTM.
    Charles – where are you? Which tropical country? Bergen appears to be on the coast so I’m sure you get tons of precipitation. Much like Seattle does.
    SM – nah, you didn’t describe my headshot. Mine were not cheesy in the least which is why I didn’t get any gigs. You were being sarcastic? Damn, you fooled me. Seriously, I thought you were serious about that. Now I know.
    Logo™ – hey, that song gets stuck in my head once a day when I do my Dior turn in the work kitchen… on the catwalk.

  28. I am in the Philippines now. That’s right we get tons of precipitation but I kindof love it. The place reminds me of the movie Twilight as well.

  29. egan says:

    Charles – which place reminds you of Twilight? The movie was filmed about two hours west of Seattle. I don’t know how the books describe the setting since I haven’t read them though.

  30. I meant Bergen. Because Forks described in the book and depicted in the film had a similar sceneries in Bergen like the gloomy weather and the lush forests.

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