The Virtue

I do, I do, I do. I do love blogging. This much I know is true. I think the community is fascinating, I enjoy reading people’s posts, and the open dialogue blogging promotes. Recently a bunch of bloggers banded to together to pay a fellow blogger’s unpaid vet bills. Where else do you find that?

While chatting with a blogger about her role in blogging, she states how it’s hard to get much attention compared to bloggers who write about their children. (I’m sure I’ve understated her opinion greatly, but it was something along those lines) Personally, it got me thinking since I’m a parent and feel the opposite.

Initially blogging was a nice outlet as a new parent. I found other parent bloggers who shared similar stories about parenthood. Honestly though, I feel being a parent has stifled my creative juices. In the past I had so many fun and random things running through my head. I couldn’t turn off all the craziness. After Baby Singe’s arrival, I didn’t want to maintain a blog entirely about my child. I told myself that couldn’t and wouldn’t happen.

Six months after her first cry, upon completion of nearly every post I stuck a checkmark in the Baby Singe category box. Twelve months later, not only were the majority of my posts baby centric, so were my Facebook Updates. My world is my daughter’s. I figured I’d get my life back after a year or so. Two and half years have passed and I’m still struggling to regain a foothold of Me Time.

2009 was the perfect storm to kill my blogging activities. Hectic work life for my wife and I, parenting, lots of rain. I kid, but these are the excuses I’ve created in my head. Excuses, they are abundant these days. They’ve been very prevalent for the past three years and I’d like to bid them farewell.

I know life will never be the same as it was prior to August 5th, 2007. I’m not that naive guy who impregnated Kourtney Kardashian. I’m learning to be okay with this and adjust my expectations accordingly. Last year I faltered with some of my athletic endeavors and took it personally. I made excuses then and I’ve made them in this post. I will rid myself of the excuses and move forward. Parenting is a joy. Being a husband is a delcious treat too. Having great friends is also swell. Balancing it all is a challenging mofo.


About lessinges

Seattle native, discovering life! I like ice cream, cold cereal, and The Amazing Race.
This entry was posted in Baby Singe, Grown-ups, Storytelling. Bookmark the permalink.

13 Responses to The Virtue

  1. LesleyG says:

    I think your answer (not that you are really looking for one) is in your own words. Yes, it’s “easier” for some people to blog as parents, but it’s for that very reason: they’re parents. And while I am not one, I know that parenthood can be viewed as a daily, if not hourly, adventure. I think, in most cases, that’s not only normal but worth chronicling and sharing.
    Although I wouldn’t mind hearing a running story or two, either. But, you know, that’s just me. 🙂

  2. egan says:

    LesleyG – I will attempt to mix it up. I’ve really struggled with the proper mix. I think it’s time to kill the TV so I can hit the pavement/treadmill, finish reading my book, and take care of myself. I did sign up for my first run of the year, an 8k in Portland.
    Sure, documenting my daughter’s growth is priority for me. However, I also don’t want to lose track of my own life. My daughter’s growth is dependent on her parents own growth.

  3. Felisa says:

    I’m not sure I’ve really been paying attention to how people treat the blogs of people who have children versus those who don’t. I feel like I read a mix of both and find that both types can be equally entertaining. And I love reading about Baby Singe! Plus that super cute youtube Cheerios video was just too awesome 🙂
    As for my absence in the blogging world… Work + classes + homework time + trying to have a social life + trying to see my family when I can + also trying to get out there and run or something when I can. I’m not really sure how I’m managing… I mean, I’ve even gotten rid of my facebook and am currently not letting myself text. I’ve been working on a post for 5 days. It’s nothing awesome but I just don’t ever have the time to sit down and just do it. I love blogging too and I really, really miss it!

  4. I think balance is hard. I write mostly about my kids because that is what I do every day. I don’t do a ton without my kids and that is fine but I do get frustrated with trying to write things lately because my kids are getting older and I don’t share as much about them to respect their privacy. Because of that, a lot of the funniest/most interesting stories have to be left out and sometimes I feel like my blog is getting more and more boring. Good thing I am a big wierdo so I still have a few things to write about sometimes.

  5. don’t fret about it, that’s my advice. do what you want/need to do. i quit touring (as a frustrated musician) when i became a dad. you know what’s right and that little one is what is most important. some younger parents want to be able to not change at all after the pitter patter of feets arrives, but kids change you and all in good ways.

  6. Gwen says:

    Don’t be so hard on yourself–it’s hard to keep writing through the rain.
    Life is change. Or maybe the quote is “life is pain.” Either way, you should also make time for sleep. (that was your mother talking)

  7. egan says:

    Felisa – thanks for the compliments about my Baby Singe posts. I’m glad you like them and the videos are enjoyable too. I’ve posted more on my YouTube account since the Cheerios one. Good luck with college. I never felt as swamped with life as I did during college because there was always reading to be done, papers to write, and friends to see. It’s a very delicate balancing act.
    Tori – you do a great job sharing your kids with your readers. I like how you do it. Yeah, when they get older it does mean you have to tread a little lighter than normal. Being a weirdo provides many blogging opportunities. I still observe crazy things myself, but sadly don’t save the stories due to Facebook.
    Van Kapeghian – thanks man for the reassurance. I didn’t expect my life not to change because I’m not naive. You’re right though, I’m probably overthinking it when that’s not necessary. Kids do bring about good change, other than my waistline.
    Gwen – hi mom! It is hard to write and comment on blogs. Thankfully most of you still visit even with my infrequent posting habits. Life is bread? Yum. I will work on getting more sleep, you’re right. Merci.

  8. JLee says:

    Glad you’re still here and I have got bad blog burnout too. I’ve actually been on Facebook more lately. Can you believe that???

  9. egan says:

    JLee – I hope to always blog. Priorities have drastically changed, but I still enjoy the posts people write and getting things off my chest in a way Facebook or Twitter can’t offer.

  10. the wino says:

    Lovely post, E.
    The writing is hard, the living is hard. Balance is damn near impossible. If either of us achieves it, I say it goes on the headstone.
    I’ve made a commitment to documenting my life, rather than meeting internal deadlines, worrying about stats, wondering if I’m entertaining. If I look at my site as a way for me to witness and to remember, I’m hoping it will seem like more of a natural extension of my life, rather than another task on the to do list. Am hoping I can hold that perspective.

  11. logo™ says:

    Ok, so…
    let’s delve into blog theory for a moment.
    Blogs serve different purposes for different people and a lot of them change over time (remember that one dog blog you used to read?).
    If you post about whatever is occurring in your life then of COURSE it is going to be heavily reflective of parenthood, and your attempts to balance everything are going to resonate with anyone who has kids, btw.
    Ya know, whatever you share of yourself here is going to spark interest in kindred souls no matter what is fueling your fire.
    I know I own one of the more neglected and unvisited blogs on The Server Which Shall Not Be Named so you can clearly see the result of my approach, but my philosophy is that your blog is yours alone and it’s form should be whatever you want.
    Whatever else you are, you are a blogger, and I am glad you are. The great thing about blogs is that they are always here, and we bloggers are a flexible bunch of folks. Live your life the way you want and need to, Egan, find your balance and tell us about it when you have the time.
    Some times they aren’t excuses, they are reasons, don’t be too hard on yourself.

  12. sari says:

    I think any blogger will always be able to look around and find people that are similar but much more popular for whatever reason. I have a blog friend who can be categorized as a mommy blogger but MAN she works her blog. She really puts herself out there and as a result is a person who is invited to things like Oprah (as a audience member, not a guest) or to meet Jillian Michaels or to have giveaways (Verizon) and things like that. I will *never* be that blogger because frankly I am not willing to work it that hard. I’m not willing to do the marketing and work because my blog is my outlet, not my job. And not because of my writing, ha ha. 🙂
    I started my blog as a me place to keep “me” around in the midst of the sea of children. it wasn’t to exclude them, but I’m not one of those bloggers who has the birthday updates and the long, poetic odes to my kids.
    I guess I’m too much of a smart as* to do that. I love my kids more than my life, and they are always around in the blog, but it’s not about “them”, it’s about “us” and there are always going to be messups and mistakes and the funny things that they do, because those are the things that I love.
    Ramble, ramble. Sorry! 🙂

  13. egan says:

    the wino – really, that’s the way blogging should be. Not about filling your sidebar with “awards” and touting your popularity. It should be a way to simply document our life, much like a journal. That’s was definitely a main goal of mine back in 2004. Oh what I wouldn’t do for some Balance on the Rocks these days. (and you bet, this post was inspired by our conversation)
    Logo – you’re really kind. You’re so right about the perspective of blogging and living your life. I need to stop using the excuses and throw them down on this blog. I always feel great after I post something new or take some time to read blogs. I’m really happy bloggers are so flexible. As you do point out, blogs aren’t going anywhere so that means we can always catch up later. I really do like what you said Logo, thank you very much.
    Sari – rambling is welcome here. I like your reason for starting your blog. I think we all have our reasons for starting and those reasons may have gotten lost in the shuffle a few years later. Not to worry, bloggers are an accepting bunch as witnessed by the comments on this very post. I don’t ever want to be a blog sellout. If someone finds stuff on my blog that interests them, wonderful. If not, there are many other things to do online. Thanks for sharing.

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